It's War!

For at least a couple of weeks I've been waging a battle of wills against a pair of sparrows. They are determined to construct one of their nasty nests in my garage. If left alone, the nest would sport long "dreadlocks" of grass. I really hate those nests and the noisy chittering (too kind a word to describe the sounds they make) of the sparrows. I really hate the sparrows, too, if you want the whole truth.

As if the building of the nests isn't irritating enough, their flight path takes them over the back of my car, which they seem to have chosen as their latrine. So, it's on, baby!

I've have done the following to discourage them being in the garage:

Me: Stuck my head out the door and yelled at them to leave.
Them: Totally ignored me.

Me: Rushed at them while also yelling for them to leave.
Them: Flew around in a panic and left the garage until I got back in the kitchen, at which point they returned.

Me: Grabbed a broom and rushed at them while yelling at them to get out.
Them: Flew around in a panic and left the garage until I got back in the kitchen, at which point they returned.

Me: Sprayed the area with a wasp spray.
Them: Returned after it dried, apparently commenting on how fresh the place smelled.

(I should mention that when I grabbed the broom, a mop and something else fell off the rack and bounced off the front of my car. When I was replacing everything that fell, I scraped my arm on the bottom of the nearby cabinet. It didn't really bleed and will probably be all healed up in another week.

After my breakfast this morning, I headed to the garage with a couple of cans to crush. When I opened the door, the sparrows watched warily, to see if I was going to attack. I didn't, actually. I crushed the cans and then headed to the stepladder that I have set up under the garage door opener. The garage door opener that hasn't worked in about 20 years. Of course, it's unplugged...so maybe it would work...but, that's beside the point because we almost never have need to open that door. I climbed the stepladder to see if another nest had been started on top of the motor...and it had been. I got down and got the screwdriver to scrape the nest away. I had cleverly placed a large trashcan under the area during my last demolition. That way the nest materials fall into it and I don't have to clean it up. I climbed back up and took care of the nest, all the while telling myself to be careful and not bonk my head on anything.

While I was doing all that, I was trying to figure out how I could keep the enemy from building there. An idea began to form. A redneck, "there, I fixed it!" idea. You might have received an email or two with photos of repairs made using duct tape, pliers and other unconventional items. So, that's what I did. First, I put aluminum foil around the area and then I covered that with plastic.

When done, I took a photo, naturally, so I could share my evil genius with the world. The first photo shows what the motor looked like before my "work". I took it of the motor over my car, because I didn't think of "before and after" until it was too late. I suspect they will now start building on the motor over my car. Sigh.

I'm too stubborn to give up...but, I do wonder how far I will go to defeat these sparrows. I can't help but think of all the "clever" plans Wile E. Coyote came up with to trap the guileless, but oblivious Roadrunner, with only failure (and injury) to show for it.

Just call me Wile E.